The 'Mary Celeste' of restaurants!

For the past five years I have been passing the 'Standard Tandoori' on Holloway Road, the one with the sign outside which proudly announces "One of the best restaurants in London", and in all this time I have never seen anyone entering or leaving it!
How does it survive? Is it a front for something?
If you know something then please tell me.

Up the Holloway!

Ah the joys of Holloway Road!
Sitting in one of my many local cafes on the Holloway Road today I overheard the following snippetts of conversation;

between an 11/12 year old boy and his beloved mum, boy to mum "stop fuckin' hasslin' me, you know I don't use a knife and fork".
Three men to the waitress, after ordering and receiving 3 plates of fish & chips, "have these been cooked seperately from the other food?", waitress "what do you mean?", one of the men "we are muslims and will not eat anything that has been cooked in the same oil as pork etc", waitress "why didn't you tell me this before you ordered?", men "it's ok we'll pay anyway", which they did and left.
I left shortly afterwards to go back to work only to find a certain Mr. Behan, of pissing on the Oxford English Dictionaries in the Central Library fame, lying on the pavement, with urine soaked trousers, cursing and swearing.
And people say they are bored of London!!!!